My internship / temporary job is coming to an end. I have been sending out my resume to company after company hoping that one would call. I think I am at thirty applications, one call, and one interview that seemed like a scheme. I am lost, annoyed, bitter, depressed and stressed out. I feel tied down, and although my optimistic side is telling me things will work out in the end, I cannot help but feel like everything is getting ready to crash down. My car feels like is going to turning into a rock on wheels any day now. I would love a steady paycheck. The word salary comes to mind, benefits, vacation pay, they sound good. Sometimes I feel like I set my standards too high.

Winter semester starts on January 8th, and I have no idea if I will have money for it, I love how the semester ends and everyone from the financial aid office decides to not return any fucking phone calls. They have the time to send me a letter telling me to call them, but then when I do they don’t return my phone call.

What I will do for a job….

1. Dress like a mascot (I had to dress like an iguana once)
2. Make cynical remarks that make you laugh
3. Talk about the cool things I saw on Gizmodo.com
4. Say ‘Ok Buddy’ 10 times a day
5. Dress girlie (if you want)
6. Act like an idiot (That comes without the job)
7. Pretend I know what I am talking about, while pulling it out of my ass
8. Wear a shirt that says “I’m with god” and then proceed to follow you around all day
9. Wear really cool shoes on Fridays
10. Be your bitch, you want coffee? Sure! What size?